November invites us to slow down, reflect, and appreciate the connections in our lives. With the holidays approaching, it can also bring feelings of loneliness and disconnection.
Carl Jung once wrote:
“Loneliness does not come from having no people about one, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself.”
Perhaps loneliness isn't always about being alone. Sometimes it's about not feeling seen, heard, or understood.
For those navigating chronic illness, this can feel especially familiar. When symptoms are invisible or difficult to explain, it can be challenging to feel truly understood.
Sometimes, in our desire to belong, we push through exhaustion, minimize our discomfort, or silence our needs to avoid disappointing others.
But what happens when belonging comes at the expense of our own well-being?
True connection doesn't require us to abandon ourselves. It creates space for our needs, vulnerability, and authenticity.
When We Become Disconnected From Ourselves
Sometimes the deepest disconnection isn't from others at all, but from ourselves.
We become so accustomed to pushing through exhaustion, ignoring discomfort, or prioritizing others that we lose touch with what our mind and body are asking for.
Over time, we may struggle to recognize our own needs, let alone communicate them to others.
In Traditional Chinese Medicine, the Heart is associated with joy, connection, and emotional presence, while the Spleen is linked to nourishment, worry, and overthinking.
These traditional associations offer an invitation to reflect: Are we nourishing ourselves as much as we nourish others? Are we listening to our needs, or becoming so caught up in our thoughts and responsibilities that we've lost touch with them?
What if reconnecting begins with something as simple as asking ourselves, “What do I need right now?”
Perhaps it's rest, expression, compassion, a boundary, or the courage to ask for support.
A Moment for Reflection
This month, I invite you to get curious:
Where do I feel most seen and understood?
Where can I ask for and allow myself to receive support?
How can I create more meaningful connections with myself and others?
Perhaps the invitation this November isn't simply to be grateful for the people in our lives, but to become more present with them and ourselves.
Connection doesn't require perfection, only presence.
With warmth,
Alyssa Carmona
Holistic Wellth